Tool: (As Yet) Untitled (TBC Album)

Apparently Tool are back in the studio writing new material, minus Maynard at this moment as he’s still touring with A Perfect Circle, whilst there seems much debate over the expected release date, it would seem likely that they will get recording a few weeks (hopefully not months..) after he returns…

Whilst Blair may have said ‘No matter how many new TOOL tunes are currently complete, I will personally guarantee that the new CD will be released on MAY 22, 2012 (or MAY 15, 2012)’ in May’s tool newsletter, and it seems several people have taken this as writ, though if you read the rest of the post its pretty clear he’s taking the piss.

More sensibly, in July’s newsletter:


“Hello, how much longer will we wait to have Tool’s new album?”


I’m guessing until it’s released.’



“I’m not here to ask questions that cannot be answered nor am I asking questions I have no business knowing. I just was wanting to know a little bit about how tool is spending the summer finishing up their album with maynard on tour with a perfect circle? How dows that work? I saw apc on the thirtieth of june in kent and it was awesome just as the first night in seattle last fall. But I couldnt help but wonder what is the rest of tool doing while maynard is working with puscifer and apc. How are they recording?”


Well… Actually, to be quite honest, it’s a pretty sad situation. Pathetic, actually, with the three of them just sitting around at the rehearsal space with guitars detuned and amps buzzing as two of them attempt to pick up dropped guitar picks with their dirty toes, and one repeatedly loosens and tightens a wing-nut as if frozen in a perpetual loop. When they’re not moping about, sucking on Pixy Stix and looking for Black Widows, to pass the time, they play Tiddlywinks and Chinese Checkers on Robitussin. That or get into heated arguments about recent episodes of “Real House Wives of Orange County.” It’s a damn shame too, because all the while the Dry-Erase board remains full of meaningless squiggly colors and bloodied bashed flies. Occasionally, in a desperate attempt to draw inspiration, they will closely watch the Arrowhead water guy as he picks up empty bottles, or listen intently to the sound made by crumpled cellophane bags of potato chips. Sometimes they listen to “Undertow.” Recently, one of the band members grabbed a shotgun and blew a considerable sized hole in the wall out of sheer frustration. Finally, having run out of Red Bulls and horse radish, Danny decided to go fishing (more info on, with Adam following suit by hanging out at WWE wrestling events. Justin flew to England. And now that they’re back, it’s the same old story. You’d think they would continue jamming, writing, and arranging new material, knowing fully well that Maynard would add vocals, lyrics, keys, etc., as well as contributing to the entire process with outstanding results. But NO… intense arguments about the “House Wives of Orange County” continue as they sit on their stools with earplugs, wondering if “The Green Lantern” sequel needs any music for its trailer…

… But then something truly amazing happened. While arguing over who gets what Tiddlywinks squidger (each anticipating a good squop, and Justin even thinking about a possible PENHALIGON!), suddenly the jagged cracks in the plaster from the recent shotgun blast inexplicably (nay, miraculously) formed the magical seal of Paimon (yes, the Goetic sigil that resembles 4 human figures standing next to one another). Seconds later, amid a flourish of trumpets and the mighty crashing of cymbals, Paimon emerged through the, now, spectral hole in the wall, seated upon a glittering dromedary and wearing a magnificent divers-colored robe redolent with arcane perfumes. As trumpets played a crazy, jazzy anti-dirge, the bloodied, swatted flies on the Dry-Erase board quickly underwent a remarkable transformation. With the dried blood vividly reddening before being absorbed back into the repulsive things, the flies became re-animated, taking on a healthy iridescence before darting away in the crescendoing agitato. In the same restorative instant, the colored squiggles changed into meaningful chord progressions, time signatures, and recognizable musical cues (such as “glue 8”, and “straight 4”). Soon, ideas began to flow, and it wasn’t long before the rehearsal space was filled with heavy guitar riffs and drums, an arrangement with sublime resolution and transitions. In short, the sound of Tool… But, to answer the question: they haven’t started recording yet…’

So it seems a new album is finally on the way! Though when it get here is anyone guess… Watch this space for news!


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